Jokes

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Mike

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Reply #15

Another programmer one, because I know these always go down a storm. @Hai  :cool:

I got 99 problems.

- so I used regular expressions.

... now I got 100 problems.

 :grin: :smiley:
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carlcall

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Reply #16

Q: Why couldn't the blonde add 10 and seven on a calculator?

A: She couldn't find the 10 key.

Carol

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Reply #17

Sexist and blondist  ...........Im gonna tell my Mum ............. :tongue:  oh shit shes dead .... :O

T-Bone Tyrone

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Reply #18

 :huh:^
I might be back....

Mike

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Reply #19

I have heard that Jeremy Clarkson is opening a fusion restaurant, offering the best of Argentinian and Indian food.

Well, we know he's partial to a bit of Argie Bhaji...
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T-Bone Tyrone

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Reply #20

 :wink:
I might be back....

Jase

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Reply #21

why did Notorious BIG not like to go on holiday ?

He didnt like tu-pac

mav469

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Reply #22

If you're easily offended i suggest you don't read on !!!!

Top gear was 12 years old !! so i guess thats the oldest thing the BBC have fucked !!!

carlcall

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Reply #23

Funny but a little low Ash.

Mike

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Reply #24

BREAKING NEWS

Police in Liverpool today pulled over a scouser and were amazed to find the car taxed tested and insured.

It wasn't stolen and there was no stolen goods or drugs found.

The driver was sober.

He had a full licence and no points.

A police spokesman said they had no option but to fine him £80 for wasting police time.
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Mike

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Reply #25

Here here. lol

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Steveanem

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Reply #26

So....this duck walks into a bar.
He says to the barman, "Have you got any bread?"
The barman replies "No we don't sell bread"
The duck says "Have you got any bread?"
The barman says "I just told you we don't sell bread, but you can have a drink if you want one"
The duck repeats "Have you got any bread?"
The barman is becoming impatient he says "I'll tell you once more, we don't sell bread...this is a pub we sell drinks"
The duck says "Have you got any bread?"
The barman is becoming irate, he says "Look I told you we don't sell bread do you want a drink or not?"
The duck says "Have you got any bread?"
The barman has had enough he exclaims "If you ask me one more time if I have any bread I'm going to nail your bill to this god damn bar!"
The duck says"Have you got any nails?"
The barman says"no!"
The duck says"Have you got any bread?"
 lol

Steve's Marines

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Reply #27

I used to be a lumberjack, I wore a new shirt everyday.........I was always chopping and and changing.  :grin:
There's a fine line between success and failure like there's a difference between surviving and thriving and we are all striving for a thriving success.

Mike

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Reply #28

The duck says "Have you got any bread?"
The barman has had enough he exclaims "If you ask me one more time if I have any bread I'm going to nail your bill to this god damn bar!"
The duck says"Have you got any nails?"
The barman says"no!"
The duck says"Have you got any bread?"

haha, lol old school humour. Reminded me of Talky, the talking toaster from Red Dwarf.
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Steve's Marines

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Reply #29

What a man called with no shins?............Tony
There's a fine line between success and failure like there's a difference between surviving and thriving and we are all striving for a thriving success.

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Last post Dec 2, 2014 10:58:45 pm
by carlcall